Friday, May 27, 2011


This being the official start of the Summer season (it's Memorial Day weekend here in the states, y'all), it's only appropriate for it to be :

National Grape Popsicle Day!!!!

Those long scorching summer days. The eternal "Family Vacation" where the only bright spot came frozen on two sticks. The familiar crack of the rock hard pop against a convenient straight edge, splitting it in two, so that you could share it with a pretty girl. The satisfaction of whittling down the stick to make a crude weapon (some of us had urban upbringings) and be "menacing" or king of the playground.

Fondness all around, from baseball diamond to city stoop, nothing can ever top these.

The Grape flavored ones were always the most sought after, especially here in New York City, where I grew up. The Orange and Cherry flavored pops were inferior, despite the fact that these were the only flavors that any ice cream cart seemed to carry. Living in an ethnic neighborhood, the shaved ice guy would come by with his 50 lb. block of clear ice and rainbow coloured bottles of flavoured syrup. However, these shaved ice sno-cones, despite having more flavour, were not the same. Personally, I think everything had to do with the sticks, but that's just an opinion.

Invented in 1905 in San Francisco by 11-year-old Frank Epperson (he accidentally left a cup of powdered soda flavoring and water with a stirring stick in it on the porch on a chilly night only to find frozen icy nirvana the next morning), it would take an additional eighteen years and a patent application for the Popsicle to achieve its legendary status.

"It was originally available in seven flavors and marketed as a "frozen drink on a stick." The form is unique, with two parts joined together on two sticks, so the two sections could be divided and shared. The flat wooden stick, similar in shape and size to an emery board, with round ends used as a handle became as well-known as the treat, commonly used for craft projects by children and adults." Source : WikiPedia

Now, for those not familiar, Popsicle is actually a brand name, and, therefore, should always be capitalized when writing; but, then again, shouldn't something this awesome always be capitalized? Popsicle brand, not to be confuse with other, inferior, types of "ice pops", is owned by Unilever, the proud manufacturers of AXE Body Spray, Vaseline, and Slim Fast products (see Unilever, if you don't believe me).

Just as wonderful as our childhood treat is, leave it up to some moron in the marketing department to maximize it into oblivion :

The $1,000.00 Dollar Popsicle

"Everybody seems to want to get their hands on a little gold in today’s economy, but what about their lips? Now there’s a cool way to do just that.
For those who can still afford it, the Marquis Los Cabos resort in Baja California Sur, Mexico is offering a $1,000 popsicle made from 24 ct. gold flakes and Tequilas Premium Clase Azul Ultra, which goes for $1,500 a bottle.
The icy treat is served poolside on a classic plastic stick and has a little sugar in it to take the edge off, though salt would seem to be more appropriate.
The patrician popsicle joins a world of fantasy foods that includes the $1,000 pizza served at Nino’s Bellisima restaurant in New York and the $1,200 Mai Tai mixed up at the the Merchant Hotel in Belfast, Ireland.
Of course, if sweets aren’t your thing, Marquis Los Cabos will be happy to pour you straight shot of the tequila used in the popsicle for a mere $500. Sounds like a bargain…for Bill Gates."

Photo and Article Courtesy : Fox News

So, upon returning from Little League practice, the question is this :

"Hey Billy, want a Grape Popsicle or a Tequila and Gold Popsicle??"

"I dunno, Mom. I must have a spare Grand in my pocket somewhere."

I suppose that you have to love Capitalism, but, at some point, I need to ask, "Do we really need this??"

Regardless, there are some very adult things that can be done with the amazing Garpe Popsicle (get your minds out of the gutter, I know what kind of porn you watch). For those so inclined :

The Grape Popsicle Cocktail


    * 2 oz. Vodka
    * 1 oz. Red Grape Juice (in other words, not the white stuff, numbskull)
    * 2 oz. Lemon-Lime Soda
    * Highball Glass with Ice
    * Garnish-Grape Popsicle on a stick for the side of the glass (a single pop)


    * Combine ingredients over a modest amount of ice in a cocktail shaker.
    * Shake and pour into a tall, chilled, very skinny, Highball Glass.
    * Garnish, of course, with a Grape Popsicle.
    * Be careful -- too much ice and the Popsicle becomes unmanageable, and that's just no fun.


©2011 Wait At The Bar

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